We spoke to filmmaker Daisy Aitkens about her short film 96 WAYS TO SAY I LOVE YOU, which screened at Cambridge Film Festival this year as part of the Short Fusion: Love and Death strand.
Jack Stocker: 96 seems like a very specific number for the film’s title. What was the reasoning behind that?
Daisy Aitkens: In his first scene the character of Mark (played by David Tennant) says “in Sanskrit they have 96 words for it and all we can say is 3.” So it is, quite literally, taken from that. Mark talking about love and how much weight we put on just three little words. Three little words that are so powerful they can change the course of history. They’re what we want most in the world yet what we fear most too. That’s a lot of pressure for 8 letters.
JS: How would you define the film?
DA: I’d call it a mockumentary about love interwoven with a simple story. I wanted the romance to be as messy and awkward and awesome as it is in real life.
JS: It’s quite an unusual structure, with lots of interspersing opinions. Is there anything in particular that inspired that?
DA: I think we’re all affected by the vagaries of other people’s opinions on our relationships. A slight remark from a trusted friend can have you questioning, wondering, spinning with anxiety. I wanted the structure to reflect these muddied voices that can drown out our own opinion, which is really the only one we should be listening to.
JS: Both friends were particularly vitriolic in their advice against saying “I love you”. Was there a specific reason for that? What were you trying to illustrate there?
DA: Well I wanted the two characters to be having parallel experiences so that’s why they both had friends who were against saying “I love you”. I think nowadays people are less quick to be vulnerable or put themselves out there because there’s such a chance of ridicule both in life and online. So many platforms to look like a dick. Let yourself be wounded, let it open you up, then start from there.
“It’s a love letter to all those people worried about saying it.”
JS: There seemed to be different pressures on both Olive and Al not to say it. Do you think the act of saying “I love you” can have different, gender specific obstacles?
DA: The pressures were less about gender and more about how desperate we are to appear strong, in control and cool in matters of the heart. But hurt happens. People we thought would be there forever aren’t and people we didn’t know would come into our lives do. What I hope we garner from the film is that true strength comes from opening ourselves up to all of these possibilities. It comes from vulnerability.
JS: Who do you identify with the most? Or was there anyone in the cast who particularly identified with the characters?
DA: I identify with the lead girl, Olive. We meet Olive at that moment where she’s been holding on to something really hard but realizes she has no choice but to let go. I’ve been there, we all have. I wrote it with Georgia in mind because there’s a strong ring of truth to everything she plays. That rare quality that makes you laugh one minute and cry the next.
JS: Do you think there are any universal truths about love, or is it all subjective to each of us?
DA: I think it has to be subjective. I know I’ve listened to friends talk about it in a way I’ve never lived through – for the good and bad. Each of us senses it through our own kaleidoscope of experience.
JS: Obviously there are a lot of conflicting opinions and experiences of love in the film. Is there an overarching message to be found within it all?
DA: It’s a love letter to all those people worried about saying it. Those three little words that keep the world turning. Say it. It may be awful but at the end of the day, it’ll affect you more than the person hearing it. You will learn a lot about yourself if you stride out in the direction of goodness, kindness and emotional bravery. Besides, not saying it is knowing that it was beautiful and important and never truly yours.